Louis Displays his marvelous habit of Haberdashery
I (Louis) have been collecting hats for as long as I can remember. Of course, my memory doesn't go back that far, so I probably only started in 3rd or 4th grade. Regardless, I've had many years to assemble my collection, and I must say I'm rather proud of it. The hats featured in this post make up only about 2/3 of my whole collection, but the rest of it is mostly just self-explanatory baseball caps and nondescript beanies. These hats were selected because they all have some sort of interesting story, or they're just weird. Before I begin to describe them individually, I would like to thank Reginald, the handsome rogue who modeled my hats with such unique panache in the photos you're about to see.
the Guatemalan
I bought this dashing hat at a wonderful outdoor store in Joseph, Oregon, a lively little town in the shadow of "Oregon's Alps" (the Wallowas). I had gone into the store with the intention of buying a straw or palm-leaf hat, as that was one of the few kinds of hat I didn't already own. Initially, none of the straw hats seemed particularly appealing. This one, however, caught my eye. What really sold me on it was the tag, which said that it had been hand-woven in Guatemala by "José M." The man who wove it had actually signed his name in pen on the tag. I couldn't say no. This hat has a story built into it. José M., wherever you are, I salute you.
Reginald's Choice
When Reginald isn't modeling for photos, he wears this hat constantly. No, really. It fits him better than it fits me. It's pure, beautiful leather, and it even has tabs on which one could attach a chinstrap. I got it at the Oregon Leather Company, a business everyone should visit. If you haven't been to the Oregon Leather Company, I expect you to go there within the week. That's an order.
The Mobster
I've had this one forever. It's a classic fedora-type hat. One time, I found myself walking around the neighborhood late at night after a formal occasion. I was wearing this hat, a black suit, and a long black overcoat. I happened to be walking about a block behind somebody. When they suddenly turned around, thinking someone was following them, I gave them a bit of a scare. I suppose I looked like a hitman or something. I felt kinda bad, but I looked really cool.
The dress-up
This is a fine kangaroo leather hat, built for the Australian outback. It's rugged, crushable, and just about indestructible. When I asked my mother how I looked in it, she said I looked like I was a little boy dressing up as a cowboy. Well, that's that, I guess.
The part-time communist
I found this one in the "bargain basement" at Next Adventure years ago. It didn't have a price tag on it, so the cashier and I haggled for it. We agreed on seven dollars. Little did he know that this was two hats in one. I'm a devious one, that's for sure.
The adventure bucket
I wear this Stetson faux-leather bucket hat quite a lot. It's totally crushable, it's water-repellent, and it looks great with a pair of aviators.
The FutureThis hat is made out of that stuff that looks different when you move it. I forget what that's called, but it's on lots of bookmarks and stuff. This hat is a real acid trip. Apparently it's based on something from Back to the Future. Not a very practical hat, but it holds its own as far as originality is concerned. |
The Old-timey baseball cap
This hat is based on the 1896 Boston-style baseball cap. The brim is non-rigid, making the hat exceedingly comfortable, although it can be remarkably hard to find a shirt that goes well with it.
The gambler
Unfortunately, this one doesn't fit me anymore. Much too small. But my oh my, it's a beauty. That's real turquoise there, folks.
The gumshoe
I got this one from a local hatshop because I actually kept one of their punch cards long enough to fill out all ten spots and get $100 dollars worth of hats for free.
The swiss army hat
This one is full of surprises. First, those goat-fur side flaps can fold down. Second, there are hidden ear flaps inside the hat that can fold down. Third, there is a bill in the front that can be folded out and buttoned into place.
The crown jewel
Anyone who knows me could probably have guessed that this would be the most important hat in the collection. When I was in sixth grade, my brother went on a high school trip to Costa Rica and bought it for me. I've been wearing it ever since. In fact, you can tell how much I've worn this hat by the fact that it used to be jet-black. The sun has faded it so much that it's now a very light brown. The logos are for Imperial, "La cerveza de Costa Rica". Apparently it's the single most popular beer in the country. Back to the point, I wear this hat so much because it is impeccably well-made. The shell is extremely tough cotton canvas, the interior is fully lined, and I've just never seen another hat quite like it. It's really a gem.
The Sarge
I picked this one up at a military surplus store in northern Alabama years ago. Now it's too small for me, and has such rigid sides it won't even begin to fit around my head.
The Safari man
This authentic pith helmet is made partially from cork. That way, the wearer can fill the hat with water, then put it on. The water trapped in the cork will slowly evaporate in the blazing sun, creating an effect known as "evaporative cooling" that keeps the wearer from dying of heat exhaustion. Fun stuff.
The legend
I found this hat stuffed behind several other hats on a lonely shelf in the back of an antique store called "Really Good Stuff" on Hawthorne Boulevard. The store is closed now, unfortunately. This hat fits me disturbingly well. I know that my hat size is seven and three-eighths, but even hats that match that size don't fit me as well as this one. It's made from very high quality oilcloth, and has a beautiful little ornament on the band. I was able to read some very faded text on the inside band, and it seems this hat is from the Outback Trading company. It's their "Kodiak" model, but according to my research they stopped manufacturing that model years ago. If this hat could talk, I would buy it coffee and get a pen and paper ready.
The shamanThis hat, I believe, is a traditional Nepali design, although it's not easy to find others like it anywhere, even on the internet. Of course, it has no brand name on it, so it's one of a kind as far as I know. I really like the way it looks. It's real wool, and the embroidered section really compliments the red color on the rest of the hat. You can also wear it backwards and use the embroidered part as an ear flap. Good work, Nepal. |
The Adam Savage
For some reason, I don't mentally associate this hat with Indiana Jones, even though it's the same style and color. I just have stronger memories of Adam Savage wearing one like it. I think both of those men are heroes, so there's not much difference, I guess.
The call of the boonies
I mostly just wear this one on hikes. It's not one of a kind and it doesn't have a whole lot of sentimental value to me, so I wear it anywhere where I think it might get scratched or otherwise messed with. It has always performed admirably.
The KommisarThis is a far more luxurious version of the similar ear-flap hat with the soviet pin. I originally considered putting the hat pin on this one, but then I realized that would mean piercing its beautiful rabbit hide with a pair of metal prongs. Absolutely unacceptable. This hat is a jewel, and must not be messed with. Few things are softer or more excellent than rabbit fur. I actually got a great deal on this one. $30, if you can believe it. |
The jungle maniacThis one is somewhat similar to the one 2 hats above. It's oilcloth, and has a wide-ish brim and a chinstrap. It's even made by the same company, Dorfman Pacific. This one, however, is much more suited to tight spaces. The brim isn't as wide, and it buttons up on either side. I wear it in places where there may be sun and rain, but there definitely won't be much headroom. Places like Keegan's ranch. |
The call of the seaThis is a variant of the classic Greek wool fisherman's cap. Apparently this design is known as the "dutch boy" or the "fiddler's cap". I bought it at a little shop in Depoe Bay, Oregon (home of the world's smallest harbor). It's probably the best place outside of Greece that I could have bought such a hat. Speaking of Greece, these hats are only made in Athens, and then shipped to San Francisco to supply the entire American demand for Aegean hats. |
The ancestor
I inherited this classic hat from my mother's side of the family. If I remember correctly, its original wearer was a sheriff in Mohave county Arizona. Since most of my mother's ancestors were sheriffs of Mohave county at one point or another, I think that's a safe bet.
This concludes the [interesting] part of my collection.
This concludes the [interesting] part of my collection.